drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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