Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
