I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize