Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
