I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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