my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
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