she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Randomize
