wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
they need to just BURY HIM!
Welp...herpes.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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