What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize