do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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