I'm really into asian looking animals
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
dude. I can hear the air.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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