I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
