It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
