Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
