Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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