nut hugger
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
