Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
