I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize