you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize