I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Dicks are not precious.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
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