We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
