This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
