Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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