sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
