If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
