but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
did you just send me my own nude
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
