He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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