whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
