Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
