dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
The adults are the big ones right?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
