is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
