"it" just moved
ugly people sure do ruin things
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
