You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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