from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
