your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize