She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
