Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
