My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
