we should wear snuggies to the strip club
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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