Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.