I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
