No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
