3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
