i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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