and next time when you feel me up, do it right
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Randomize
