My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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