Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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