my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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