How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Randomize