It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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