They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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